Millions

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(c) AJMalouin 2006
(Ratings: 3 by Al and 5 by Caryl) (2004/UK/USA. Directed by Danny Boyle.) (1 hr 38. Rated PG for thematic elements, language, some peril and mild sensuality. This film has been re-edited to attain this re-rating.)

Caryl & Al say this often and they say it here again about this: rent this film before you see anything else.

“Millions” is another project from the director who saw fit to bring us two of the films which are among Al’s favorites(1). It’s a funny, poignant film that leaves us with the impression that money isn’t everything. Especially when you have lots of it.

In the last days before converting to Euros, England has money to burn. Billions of pounds of it. Sensing the senselessness in this, well-oiled thieves steal millions off of a train heading to England’s incinerators.

The thieves throw the money off the moving train, where a huge bag of it drops into the hands of young freckle-faced Damien. That’s when the fun begins, as Damien and his brother Anthony, kids both of them, try to decide what to do with the money.

Eventually their father, his love interest Dorothy, and lots of the brothers’ school mates also become involved in the decision-making.

The thief who was supposed to collect the huge tumbling bag also has an interest in the decision. He dogs young Anthony in several tension-filled and terrifying scenes. It’s a tribute to the film that this terror can occur briefly in a project that also features characters like a Monty-Python-like community policeman.

And, oh yeah… Anthony also studies a book called THE LIVES OF THE SAINTS. He studies it sooooo much so, in fact, that the saints become real to him. They become so real that they actually come visit him. These are real-life saints who smoke cigarettes, freely admit (as does Lili Von Shtupp in “Blazing Saddles”) that they are just “tired,” and who poo-pooh the occurrence of miracles.

This entire film, however, is a miracle and will be the funniest, brightest, cheeriest and best films you will ever see!
—
(1) Those films are “Shallow Grave” and “Trainspotting.”